August 21, 2017 / 20:11 PM
Skin first, make-up second.
A year after my life-changing education on skin care, I’ve skipped the daily medium to full coverage foundation and opt for a light tinted moisturizer or BB Cream – except on the occasional whole day event. I forego the thick cream concealer, sans the acne, and use a brightening liquid concealer to highlight my under eyes and the bridge of my nose. Bumps on my forehead are gone ...
August 14, 2017 / 22:23 PM
If you’re reading this as a single man or woman who feels strongly about a relationship – even marriage – you’re not the only one. I’ve been single for as long as I can remember. Most days, I don’t mind the wait, but as much as I love learning about the Lord on my own, I eagerly wait for the day when I can grow in faith with my partner.
Friend, I want to affirm you and let you know it’s okay to be faith-filled..and still be lonely. When my lonely gets too loud, I tell myself it’s alright. This is human – as human as anyone can get. If people invalidate your desire and say you lack faith because “you are not satisfied in the Lord,” talk to someone else. Your desire is God-designed – God created Eve for Adam as a helpmate – in the same way that others have the equally blessed gift of singleness. But then, this isn’t an excuse to waste this fulfilling albeit tiring season. You eventually get to a point when you understand its purpose. This is exactly when you allow His faithful plans to unfold.
Read: Single, Faithful, and Not Waiting
- Make peace with your past.
The most liberating feeling is knowing your shortcomings, asking atonement for them, and making way for God to renew you. I’m pretty sure we all have had (almost) relationships and “cheap” imitations of love we want to keep in the farthest corners of our minds – or even pray into non-existence – but wounds often arise when these aren’t properly dealt with. Before you can genuinely be content with the season you’re in, make peace with the people you’ve hurt, make peace with God, and make peace with yourself. God can trace away all the murky, sad parts of you you’re afraid to show others – if you let Him. Let these chains (of hurt and self-loathing) be broken.
You will no longer remember the shame of your youth. (Isaiah 54:4)
Guard your heart, you’ve probably heard that – and if you’re in a Christian environment, endless amount of times. But, do you guard your contentment? The simple act of binge-watching Koreanovelas or romantic comedies makes any woman want the fairytale-type-of-love fast. Personally, I watch vlogs from itsjudyslife every single day. When I get really lonely, I cry myself to sleep because I don’t have what they have. (I’m not exaggerating.) I’m not telling you to stop watching these shows, I have no intention of doing so too, but take caution in what holds your heart and mind captive.
Months ago, I deleted a playlist with sad love songs I listened to when I wanted to indulge in my sadness. Rather, I pray and redirect my thoughts to higher things. Stop romanticizing your sadness, and know what triggers it.
- Learn from your relationships.
And no, not from romantic ones. How do you treat those you have nothing to gain from? Are you creating new relationships and nurturing old ones? Are you plugged in a solid community that helps you grow or are you too busy engaging in futile acts like gossip to belong to one? How you treat those around you will eventually be how you treat your partner.
For women, do you affirm the men around you? Do you push them towards Christlikeness? For men, do you treat women with respect and protect them? Do you let their unique femininity radiate? Regardless of your “intentions,” kindness doesn’t go unnoticed.
- Passively wait, actively serve.
Are you pursuing your best, the Lord? Do you make time for Him? Are you delighting in Him and His precepts,
August 13, 2017 / 18:27 PM
Whether you’re “adulting” and employed or still completing university, we all want to be smart consumers when it comes to our *occasional* beauty shopping! Admit it, it’s pretty common to treat ourselves simply because we feel entitled to “enjoy” the fruits of our labor – am I right, ladies? But, did you know that there are many ways to save money? These are things I personally comply to and resources you may not know about to do just that!
August 12, 2017 / 12:19 PM
(From L-R: Ever Bilena Matte Liquid Lipsticks in Dusk, Toast of New York, Siennas, and Sexy Nude from Watsons, P185)
I remember my first tube of Ever Bilena lipstick. It was stored in the infamous plastic black bullet with a sneak peek of the color on top. I was a junior in college, completely oblivious to anything related to beauty and on rare occasions, a mere recipient of products from relatives abroad and my beautiful mother. ...
July 23, 2017 / 00:27 AM
In Dua Lipa’s New Rules MV, you see a group of beautiful women – with mascara-dripped faces and blinding highlight – “supporting” one another (emotionally) in a singsong, theatrical production. As of writing, it has 33M views – pretty sure because many can relate. Let me tell you something, it’s everything I want to tell my friends who settle.
Now, don’t get me wrong…I’ve been there, and my closest friends can attest to that (with my desperate text messages at 3AM all in CAPS LOCK – because FEELINGS). Having said that, I’ve also met and comforted way too many heartbroken women who have felt abandoned. Sometimes, we persist to stay in situations that don’t benefit us but we’re too caught up in the person, in the feeling that we need to be reminded that, really, we don’t need to. This may be a part of life but that’s it; don’t let it become your life. Let this be your salvation: love doesn’t need to be complicated. If you’re trying too hard, there may be something wrong.
- Ladies, you are not just somebody’s “afterthought.”
You are not a chance lost *cough Jollibee TVC cough,* you are, first and foremost, a choice. Stay away from boys who only seek your presence when it’s convenient. Never compromise your standards to fit someone in the picture. If you have different beliefs, if you’re running towards opposite directions, it’s time to be firm and stand your ground.
- Never act on your emotions when you’re lonely.
I’ve been there. 12AM messages left “seen” you immediately regret until the wee hours of the morning. (Girl, sayang ‘yung skin care mo, itulog mo na lang ‘yan – ikagaganda mo pa!) It’s okay to be lonely, but how do you respond to it? If you think you’ll find a good man on some hook-up app or in a bar, please reconsider. I know the attention is so enthralling, and you hunger for it, but there is so much on the line. I say this all the time but lead your heart before it leads you.
- Handle your expectations.
Correct me if I’m wrong but so many of our deepest hurts come from unmet expectations. Before we put the “blame” on the other party…kayo ba talaga or is it just a M(alabong) U(sapan)? If a guy can’t bravely put himself to lay it out then you have every right to ask for clarity.
- You don’t have to work for anybody’s attention.
A good man won’t stop at anything if he really likes you. You are worth pursuing. Call me old-fashioned but it is the man’s job to initiate.Take this (and everything else I say, really) with a grain of salt. If you end up second-guessing your words and actions again and again – almost to the point of crippling self-doubt and self-loathing – it’s time to stop and evaluate your circumstances.
“A woman in her glory, a woman of beauty, is a woman who is not striving to become beautiful or worthy or enough. She knows in her quiet center where God dwells that He finds her beautiful, has deemed her worthy, and in Him, she is enough. In fact, the only thing getting in the way of our being fully captivating and enjoyed is our striving. This is why we must keep asking. Ask Jesus to show you your beauty. Ask Him what He thinks of you as a woman. His words to us let us rest and unveil our beauty.”
(Stasi and John Eldredge, Captivating: Unveiling the Mystery of A Woman’s Soul)
Bottom line, if you’re settling for cheap imitations of love, you are doing yourself a disservice.